A little birdy told me I had a special visitor here, isn’t that interesting?

At first I thought ah shit, all my most personal thoughts are here and that cunt fuck is reading it. But then, I thought why would it matter? All that is written is the truth and I pride myself on being a honest human being, unlike some out there.

You may see how you nearly broke me, but never EVER mistake that as weakness.

I am not weak and never have been, only the strongest can survive that shit and I survived it like a warrior, oh wait sorry I forgot that’s your word 🤣

Blogging is not against the law. I name no names here therefore I have never breached my promise to the court. It’s completely legal, soz babe.

Are you worried people may not believe your bullshit?

Are you worried people may see you for what you are?

I used to be worried what people would think of me, but not anymore and especially not you.

You will never win me back. It is simply not an option. And I hope that hurts like a bitch. Let’s be real here, you will never even come close to having a woman like me again. And that’s just what I am now, a woman. Not the scared vulnerable 15 year old girl you managed to manipulate.

I am a strong, beautiful, smart, loyal and brave woman.

All qualities you do not have and will not ever possess.

I am so far from the person you broke me down into. You do not scare me anymore, I simply pity you. Deep down you have noone and nothing going for you because your not real, your fake. It’s only when you get frustrated that your plans aren’t working that the mask slips for a short while and out comes the real perp. The evil, manipulative and cruel man I know that you really are.

My children do not need you and unfortunately yes they are scared of you. You will never admit the damage you caused to them but that’s ok, because they have me.

I am the one who will battle through with them on their paths to recovering from your abuse. I am the one by their sides no matter what. I’m the one who is there for my son when he cries and says he hates himself and wants to die. I’m the one there for my daughter when she cries at how scared she was to loose me.

You know the other day I saw my shrink and I actually said how amazing my baby girl is and how strong she is and that she hadn’t really ever gotten upset or showed signs of how she has been affected by shitcunts behaviour. Until last night.

She was telling me she had got told off at school, and all of a sudden she just burst and was hysterical with tears. I’m like woah it’s ok everyone gets in trouble at school sometimes it’s fine!!

Her actual words were…

“It reminded me of when we went to nannas and I was scared I was going to be told off for running after you to the car. I felt very conscious, I waited til daddy walked away and then I just had to run out the door to you because I was so scared I would never see you again”

😭😭😭😭😭

My 6 year old baby girl broke my heart with those words.

To be honest that right there is PTSD. A a simple telling off at school leads to a flashback like that? That isnt normal. She then also told me about the bad dreams she has of being taken and people being hurt.

She’s fucking 6 years old. 6 years old.

Piece of shit cunt.

What she is referring to happened about 3 or 4 weeks before I finally left he had kicked me out again in the evening, I had my keys (as always in preparation) and I got into the car and I looked up and saw my little sweetheart running to the car 😫 my boy then followed but so did dickhead, he persuaded him to stay and sent him inside but she wouldn’t go she was so upset, my poor little darling. I managed to drive off and get to my mums. I hated leaving him behind but I knew he would be physically safe, where as if I stayed I wouldn’t be and atleast I could get them both out of that environment even just for a little while.

And that’s just what you do isn’t it? Focus on him because you know he would be much easier to manipulate. That’s why you only ever talk about him and not her.

Do you seriously, in all fucking honestly think I’m gona let that happen again?

Noone will ever hurt my children again.

Just like today when she said to me, “Mummy I don’t think I’ll ever want a boyfriend”

I asked why.

“Because I don’t want all this stuff that happened with daddy and you to happen to me”

I said, “Hold on, firstly, mummy will never ever let anyone hurt you and if they did I would kill them. Secondly it wont ever get to that baby because I won’t let it, you’ll have me there and we wont have it. Just like now, mummy won’t have that anymore and that’s why we walked away”

Not a fucking chance in hell is that gona happen. Already she has a strong soul and by the time I’ve finished raising her she will be the baddest most strongest fucking woman out there, just like her mama!! 💪

One day you may see them again, perhaps if you stopped buying yourself shit you might be able to afford court. I mean, it’s just an idea 🤷‍♀️

My answer to contact is a firm no.

Only a court order can force it, strong safeguarding concerns means my decision (regardless of parental rights) is perfectly legal. And I have plenty of evidence to back it too.

I’m also fine thanks for asking.

Physically, I hate to say it mate but I’m looking pretty banging. Ha, gutted.

Mentally, I am stronger than ever.

And I’m not even CLOSE to being where I will be once I have regained all of my self worth and confidence that you so savagely tried to steal from me.

You don’t want my kids, you just want me.

But unfortunately sweetheart we don’t aways get what we want in life, lifes a bitch so suck it up already and jog the fuck on.

Very soon I will be on top form.

I will restart my career, I will have a beautiful home, and the most amazing life with my children, family and friends.

I will also party, have fun, laugh and shag as many fucking men as I want to coz we know what a fucking hoe I really am… LOL

😂🖕

Song for every blog…

And yeh, I sing what I want when I want coz ain’t no cunt here telling me what to do!

Zara Larson – Don’t worry bout me

Now that you hurting like hell
You see things that reminds you of me everywhere
Just know that I, I’m fine tonight

You’re tryna stay in my life
Ain’t got the space or the time
It’s too late now, I’m moving on
I’m so unfazed, you ain’t what I want, no

Don’t worry bout me
You should worry bout you, yeah, yeah
Keep doing what you do best, babe
That’s loving only yourself, babe
Cause I’ve been sleeping okay
Don’t worry ’bout me
You should worry ’bout you
Yeah, that’s your problem, so fix it
Cause I ain’t none of your business
Now I’ve been sleeping okay

Until next time,

B xxx